INT. LUCAS RANCH – SCREENING ROOM – DAY (1998)
As John Williams’ classic closing credits theme plays, the lights go up in George Lucas’ private screening room. Our heroes have done it. The fanboys have seen “The Phantom Menace.”
FANBOY #1: What the hell was that?
FANBOY #2: Midi-chlorians? Midi-chlorians!? What — the force is a blood disease?
FANBOY#3: That movie was racist to, like, three races!
FANBOY #1: Meesa childhood go boom.
CANCER FANBOY: (WEAK) Why didn’t we break into the Wachowski Brothers’ ranch instead? “The Matrix” would have been so much better to see before I…
Cancer Fanboy dies.
FANBOY #4: (WAKING UP NOISES) Huh… Wha…? I fell asleep about ten minutes in. Did the trade federation ever lift that tariff?
SMASH CUT TO
End credits in the style of “Star Wars” end credits (presumably).