Just when you’re ready to break up with the Internet, forever, and take back the lingerie you bought it, you stumble on things that remind you that it’s sort of good for something. Like these two blog posts, which make me embarrassed that I pretend to be a professional writer.
1. A friend of mine sent me a link to this recap of Breaking Dawn. It’s brilliant. For example, on Edward and Bella’s traumatic wedding-night romp:
I bet half the problem would have been solved here if they hadn’t been in the missionary position. No, this is not actually stated. Whatever, you know they were.
She’s just saying what we’re all thinking.
2. I don’t know who this person is, but he calls himself War Nerd, and I’m pretty sure he’s a really, really bad human being, but damn, he can definitely write. In particular he has written an essay about the fighting in Georgia.
See, this is the war that I used to see in the paintings commissioned by Defense contractors in Aviation Week and AFJ: a war between two conventional armies, both using air forces and armored columns, in pine-forested terrain.
He’s enjoying this way too much.
I want to add, apropos of nothing, that I got an e-mail from somebody plausibly claiming to be Joseph Kahn, director of the Neuromancer movie, pointing out that I shouldn’t believe Internet rumors. He is of course correct.