Worst Valentine Ever

By Matt Selman | February 23, 2009 | +

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Kemper

When you open the card, does a little mushroom cloud pop up with a little refrigirator flying away from it? With a cute little caption like “You Make My Heart Go Boom!”? Because that would be just precious….
Dave

“You make me want to make a 5th Indiana Jones movie!”?
`
Bad idea?
tereglith

“When I’m with you, I feel like kicking a monkey off a cliff from my car, and watching as its CGI butt lands on a fortuitiously placed branch!”
.
No?
eduardojencarelli

Go figure. I already love Irina Spalko as much as any Indy villain. The accent, the overplayed ambition, definitely a classic b-movie villain, just like the smug nazi general from the third film. She already feels like a classic addition to the pantheon. I’d take that any day over no valentine at all.
Carlos the Dwarf

Hey Selman I’m watching “funeral for a friend” which aired in 2007. Let me just say “Tivo jokes? really?” How much of Matt Groening died inside when he saw his show ripping off two year old Family Guy jokes? But hey i have to give you props for being so willing to point out how completely and utterly out of ideas you guys are by bringing back Sideshow Bob. Again. Along with not just one, but two Frasier guest voices…in 2007. Good god man, just let it die, please… please?
Dave

@Carlos – maybe if we can convince Selman to push the worst ideas possible for the Simpsons, the network will finally realize that it just needs to die.
`
So Matt… I was thinking the other day, while I was watching, enjoying, and laughing at the Simpsons in HD episode, that the only gimmick better than Simpsons in HD would be this: the Simpsons in 3D! I mean, it made for such a great Chuck episode, and the Super Bowl commercials were just off the charts, imagine what the comedic genius of the Simpsons would do combined with the cutting-edge technology of 3D! I can see it now: Sideshow Bob throws a knife at Bart… and the knife looks like it’s coming right at the viewer!!! I’m getting goosebumps just thinking about it.
Rorschach

Or, you know, you could just not watch a repeat of a show you don’t like anymore. Or also you could send an e-mail or make a voodoo doll instead of threadjacking. Those would be my suggestions.