The iPhone: Bringing Back the Art of the Pickpocket

 

Artist's conception of thief stealing my iPhone
Artist's conception of thief stealing my iPhone

April 30th, 6:35 pm. Crowded C train into Brooklyn. I finish my umpteenth round of Wurdle, failing once again to make a high score, and conclude that my former self is more intelligent than my present self. An inevitable consequence of the aging process. I drop my iPhone into my (external) jacket pocket. Two stops later I’m off the train. My iPhone has not come with me.

Obviously as a high-level PC, I’m presenting a high negative modifier to any potential thief (-5% for each level). He must have been fairly high-level himself — a sharper perhaps (7th level), or even a magsman (8th). Maybe he was a half-elf (+10% for racial ability — ah those were the days). Still he got lucky with that roll. Though God knows, I’m still in AD&D rules — he’s probably on 4th edition, could be a completely different ruleset …

 

Seriously, my iPhone got stolen yesterday. Makes you wonder if the popularity of the iPhone has brought about a revival of the old-school pickpocket’s art. I mean, this was some serious Oliver Twist stuff — that phone was on the street and fenced 2 hours later. Though honestly, the guy who bought it, what was he thinking? He had the use of it for 6 hours, tops. Though I suppose they probably unlocked it. He didn’t seem very interested in discussing it during our brief but fascinating conversation.

It wouldn’t bother me that much, except the damn thing had my Ursula K. Le Guin interview on it, which I hadn’t finished transcribing yet. Sigh.

Related Topics: Gadgets, Smartphones
  • http://youtube.com/churchhatestucker Church

    That’s why I prefer a belt case.
    .
    So, you’re without a Cylon Detector App? Or did you get a replacement already?

  • meredith81

    That sucks, Lev. I got pick-pocketed a couple of years ago for a MetroCard and some change (change purse, open backpack pocket). Apparently, pickpockets are still pretty active in the subways, so I wouldn’t really say it’s a revival of any kind. Still, it’s a bad feeling when someone takes your stuff; all touching your personal property and whatnot.

    Speaking as a 4th Edition Rogue, though, I have to say the new skill checks sound simpler than all that % nonsense of yours. The DC to take an iPhone on a crowded subway has to be low, and the stealth bonus for blending in the crowd must be massive.

  • http://www.simonvinkenoog.nl/beeld/Yogi%20-%20Annelies%20Rigter.jpg yogi

    Wait, the guy actually answered the phone? Hilarious. Now get the cops on tracking the GPS! This is important.

  • http://bjonas0725.wordpress.com/ Don

    Did you at least record the call? That would make for interesting reading, y’know…

  • Kemper

    Did the thief have a cockney accent when you talked to him since you think he was part of an Olvier Twist type gang?
    .
    ” ‘ello, guvner. I’ve gone and pinched your shiny phone, ‘aven’t I?”
    .
    Because that would have almost made it worth it.

  • dennitzio

    If a recoverable iPhone crash made a man of you, then this experience should make you an orc or something.

  • LeeJH

    Some thieves have no taste. They should at least steal a decent mobile that can record video and such.

  • tyrantking

    I don’t even know what to say about the belt case comment. Wow.

  • Lev Grossman

    @kemper I should have gone all rhyming slang on him!

  • http://youtube.com/churchhatestucker Church

    @tyrantking: The frak? Why the belt case hate?

  • dennitzio

    Quick! Sound off! Belt case versus pocket! Go!

  • tyrantking

    I just think the belt case screams “mug me”. Obviously the jacket pocket was a horrible decision (always go with front pants pockets), but getting pick-pocketed beats getting mugged every time.

  • http://youtube.com/churchhatestucker Church

    @tyrantking – Yeah, but if you’re wearing a jacket (as Lev obviously was) the belt case gives you the security of the pants pocket with the accesability of the jacket pocket.

  • http://techland.com/2010/05/27/im-calling-it-voicemail-is-dead/ I’m Calling It: Voicemail Is Dead – Techland – TIME.com

    [...] got a new iPhone about ten months ago. (My last one got stolen.) I dicked around with the settings. I set up e-mail, threw some apps on there, as one does. I [...]

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