Confessions of an Execrable Imbecile

Longtime Simpsons writer and world-class hilarious person Mike Reiss responds to critical reaction to his latest movie:

I wrote a sweet little romantic comedy called My Life in Ruins.  It was about a bus tour of Greece, and had big laughs, gorgeous scenery, and a simple message:  don’t judge others too harshly.

One critic called it “execrable.”

I was fully prepared for bad reviews, but nothing quite this vicious.  An actor friend, who’d been in a critically trashed play, tried to spin it:  “Execrable can mean ‘deserving to be excreted.’  See?  ’deserving.’  That’s good!  Or it can mean ‘of poorest quality.’  Ok, see? ‘quality.’  That is also very good!”

I was surprised because my film was the highest-testing movie in Fox Searchlight history. Audiences liked it more than, say, Little Miss Sunshine and Slumdog Millionaire.  But not the critics.  They called it “one big fat Greek disaster”;  “wretched”;  “thuddingly bad”;  “a film that will kill Greek tourism”; and “a steaming pile of stereotypes and sitcomery, a pathetic excuse for a comedy.”  That last review sent my wife to a sickbed for three days, with what Victorian doctors used to call “the vapors.”

Several critics singled me out, calling me “an idiot,” “an imbecile,” and “sub-literate.”  Now, I opened the film with an allusion to Voltaire – a sign reads “Pangloss Tours: ‘The Best of All Possible Worlds’.”  In Candide, Dr. Pangloss utters these optimistic words before his group sets out on an utterly disastrous journey.  Just like the tourists in my film!  Get it?  The critics didn’t.   Not one caught the allusion.  Otherwise, they’d have called me a “sub-literate moron who reads Voltaire.”

At least half a dozen reviewers asked, “Did we need this obvious retread of If It’s Tuesday, It Must Be Belgium?” I’ve never seen that film.  It came out forty years ago, when I was nine.  And while I don’t recall the critics of the time deeming it a classic, it’s clearly the ne plus ultra of travel films.  There have been gangster movies since The Godfather and space movies since Star Wars.  But don’t try setting a movie on a tour bus.  It’s been done.  Once.  Two generations ago.

In the end, I guess life evens out.   I created a show once that the public simply hated.  The critics adored it.  It was about a critic.  It was called The Critic.

Related Topics: movies, Gaming & Culture
  • http://youtube.com/churchhatestucker Church

    Ah, but by implication ‘execrable’ also means ‘worth consuming.’
    .
    I should be in marketing.

  • Carlos the Dwarf

    The Critic? It STINKS!

  • republibotthreepointoh

    Actually, Church, I think it means “Worth consuming *before* [insert name] got a hold of it and turned it to scheist.” Which is no reaction to Mike Reiss’ work in this movie or elsewhere. Critics are paid to have opinions, and bad reviews are always funnier and more talked about than positive ones, so they like to pick things out for a drubbing. I know a critic who honestly thinks Citizen Kane is the worst movie ever made, and flat out doesn’t get Bergman’s “The Seventh Seal” at all, yet he still feels his opinions are ‘valid’ and even ‘educated.’

  • Rorschach

    Sorry about your movie, but The Critic is the greatest thing that has ever happened to this world or any other.

  • http://www.yogaforce.com yogaforce

    That Mike Reiss is a pretty smart and v. nice guy with a pretty stellar career. Looking forward to see what he comes up with next.

  • anon76

    Really nice? I haven’t met him personally, but went to a talk he gave and all I could think was pure smart ass. Very funny, mind you, but cheeky to the core (and not exactly flattering of Groening).
    He also pissed me off for pooping on the fans during the commentary of ‘Last Exit to Springfield’. We’re the audience: if we say its the best episode, then it is The. Best. Episode. Ever.

  • anubus

    The critic was great, anyone who didn’t like it needs a sense of humor. my favs: “Buy my Book, Buy my Book!” “Make em’ Squeal!!!” and of course “it stinks!”

  • eduardojencarelli

    Now this is why I avoid movie reviews. They seem more concerned with drawing readers than they are in actually analyzing the film. No wonder you produced an animated show about a grumpy and self-absorbed critic like Jay Sherman.
    .
    One example: I nearly missed T4 because of bad reviews. I’m glad I didn’t. I even found it to be slightly better than T3, even if not stellar.

  • dennitzio

    As a person sucked into a big, fat Greek family, I’m looking forward to seeing it with all my in-laws. I don’t know if Reiss did a lot of research on Greeks first, but Nia Vardalos probably Hellenified it pretty thoroughly if not. Her other movie was practically a documentary of the time when I met my wife’s family for the first time. My mother-in-law really did offer to serve me lamb when I told her I don’t eat (red) meat, and everyone in the family is named Nick or Nico or Nikki or Nika. She didn’t do right by his WASPy family though. They were really a waste of paper – mine are much more interesting but still just as alien to my Greeks. My mother is a mountain climber, and they don’t get that at all. To them, walking to the car counts as exercise.

  • himester

    What ever happened to enjoying a fun movie? Enjoyed it with my wife, but not nearly as much as the rest of the Atlanta audience. I’d like to be imbecilic enough to make a movie audience laugh so often. Beware of Geeks bearing criticism.

  • lostepic

    Ok. I havent seen big fat greek wedding or this movie, but this didnt look like an imbecilic movie. Half the 15-25 comedies are imbecilic. Besides, your response “The critics didn’t. Not one caught the allusion. Otherwise, they’d have called me a “sub-literate moron who reads Voltaire.” and “At least half a dozen reviewers asked, “Did we need this obvious retread of If It’s Tuesday, It Must Be Belgium?” The Godfather and space movies since Star Wars. But don’t try setting a movie on a tour bus. It’s been done. Once. Two generations ago.” That says it all. I wasnt going to see it, just because I am not a guy that sees romcom’s on my own, but now I will see it out of spite against said critics.

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