Raising a Nerdy Child: A Catalog of Artifacts, Part One

I will love my daughter whatever and whoever she becomes. But yeah, I’m not going to lie to you, it would be cool if she turned out nerdy like her dad.

Sadly, neuroscience has not progressed to the point where I can literally force Lily, through a nightmarish barrage of drugs, neurosurgery and post-hypnotic commands, to behave in a nerdy fashion. So I’m just going to supply her with some of the key nerdy artifacts of my own childhood and see if they contribute to the natural emergence of nerdy behavior.

On days when I have nothing more important to blog about, I will catalog these items here.

Artifact 1: D’Aulaires’ Book of Norse Myths, by Ingri and Edgar Parin d’Aulaire

If anybody ever scans my brain with an MRI, they will probably see the ghostly image of this book cover overlaid on my lobes: Odin on his eight-legged steed Sleipnir, galloping through the air above a pitched battle, hefting his spear Gungnir, while Valkyrie claim heroes to take to Valhalla in the background. I read it that many times.

The really magnificent thing about this book is that although it simplifies the Norse myths, it does so without sanitizing them. The pages are chock-full of colorful drawings of heroes chopping each other into bits. It also somehow keeps the weirdness and wildness of the stories. Like when Loki changes himself into a sexy girl-horse, and seduces a boy horse, and they have a baby horse together (that’s Sleipnir) of whom Loki is the mommy. The kids should know about these things.

And sure, there’s a goat that lives on top of Valhalla and rains mead down out of its udders for dead heroes to drink. And sure, there’s a squirrel that runs up and down Yggdrasil, the world-tree, ferrying insults back and forth between the eagle that sits at the top and the dragon that gnaws on its roots. Why wouldn’t there be?

And Odin hangs himself on Yggdrasil so that he can come back more powerful than ever. When I read her that part I could almost see Lil’s brain just getting weirder and more complex, second by second, as she thought about the sheer recursiveness of it. The dude sacrificed himself to himself.

Of course, she’s still into all the Disney princesses. And she calls the warrior’s helmets “opera hats.” Doesn’t matter. The seed has been planted.

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Tripp

Awesome book, a great choice. We’ve had luck with Marvel Adventures Avengers comics (a super sunny version that is the opposite of the Ultimates) and the Arkham Horror boardgame.
http://www.examiner.com/x-562-Book-Examiner michellekerns

Oh, oh, you should absolutely read her Rosemary Sutcliff’s version of The Iliad and Dorling Kindersley’s version of The Odyssey. And throw in D’Aulaire’s Book of Greek Myths for kicks, too. I read all three of those to my innocent, Cinderella and Ariel-loving oldest daughters when they were at the tender ages of 7 and 6 and they morphed overnight into bloodthirsty Amazonians. They were completely obsessed with all of the gory details and wanted to discuss at length exactly HOW it is an arrow can kill someone (“Will it kill you if it hits you here? What about here? Or here?”) or what it would feel like to have your liver eaten out by a eagle or whatever it was every day for the rest of your life.

I’d tell them, “O.K., we’re going to read one chapter and that is IT,” and they would beg and plead and whine and we’d end up reading five. The best part was watching them act the scenes out with their Barbie and Ken dolls. Especially when they did the kidnapping of Persephone one. I wish to God I’d videotaped that stuff.
http://www.mabfan.com Michael A. Burstein

Wow. I loved that book and the Greek Myths one when I was a kid. I used to take them out of the library over and over.

I’m pleased to note that I own a copy of each one.
dennitzio

I’m starting it easy, with Hobbit. So far, my 5-year-old’s stuck it out, with a few days backsliding to Eloise or Olivia. She’s asked a lot of semi-awkward questions about swords, killing, death, goblins, why trolls turn to stone, what eagles eat, and the weird noises outside Beorn’s. But she likes to tell riddles – “like Bimbo” – so I take that as a good sign.
yummycarrots

Tell me you’ve seen D’aulaires’ Trolls, too! So many horrific and amazing illustrations of many-headed trolls and steam-nosed horsebeasts and the dangers of turning into rock when the sun rose… those D’aulaires must have thrown excellent parties.
http://www.examiner.com/x-562-Book-Examiner michellekerns

Have her listen to the full ensemble cast audiobook recording of The Hobbit when you’re done reading the book to her. She’ll become a devout Tolkeinist, guaranteed.
pittsburghpoet

Mainline it. Edith Hamilton’s _Mythology_.
http://www.twitter.com/leverus Lev Grossman

@yummycarrots picked up Trolls on the same shopping binge!
Cliff

So I’m just going to supply her with some of the key nerdy artifacts of my own childhood and see if they contribute to the natural emergence of nerdy behavior.
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That’s pretty much how it worked with me. My parents put me in close proximity to mythology books and their SF&F books, and voila!
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The dude sacrificed himself to himself.
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That’s why he’s The Boss.
thatguyivan

Can’t wait to see what the second artifact will be !!!
http://techland.com/2009/11/16/raising-a-nerdy-child-iphone-games/ Raising a Nerdy Child: iPhone Games – Techland – Time.com

[...] is part 2 of an irregular series about my attempts to turn my daughter into a complete [...]
carterjp

Incredibly good first choice for an artifact. Got the Greek Myths from an aunt when I was young, which led me to get the Norse book from the library and keep it for so long I was afraid they’d come to my house to collect the fine.

Looking forward to the next artifact–will it be Legos? E. Nesbit’s Dragon book? How about the Philadelphia Orchestra’s version of Peter and the Wolf [narrated by David Bowie?] May not be nerdy enough but it sure is creepy/delightful.
http://queensmajor.wordpress.com queensmajor

This is great everybody! Keep laying the titles on me. My younger sister is about to be 10 and she never reads, and she’s only interested in the tween-girl disney channel tv shows.

She needs some serious nerdifying!
http://techland.com/2010/02/10/the-all-time-top-10-ice-planets/ The All-Time Top 10 Ice Planets – Techland – TIME.com

[...] 5. Pluto. Yeah, it's real, so what? Thing's still made of ice. Or partly. If I had to pick the best fictional context for Pluto, it'd have to be the part in Larry Niven's World of Ptavvs (top 10 greatest titles ever!) where somebody tries to land a rocket on it, and it turns out that a lot of the frozen gases are flammable, and the whole planet catches on fire. 6. Niflheim. The primorial world of mist and ice in Norse mythology. Those Norse, they knew from ice. Brought to you by D'Aulaire's Book of Norse Myths. [...]