Avatar Erotica: Na’vi Sex, a Sticky Situation

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As I’ve seen Avatar a second – and yes, third – time, I’ve become more intrigued by some of the story’s side details. Subtle looks here and there, between Jake and Neytiri. The way the animals move against the humans in the epic final battle sequence. The way Tsu’Tey just owns the marines standing on that half-lowered cargo bay door, until the last man standing shoots him dead. (Check out Techland’s complete Avatar coverage)

And then there was the news that James Cameron snuck in a few key scenes purely for the sake of setting up a sequel – a revelation that has left me hunting endlessly for Avatar 2 clues. I’m still not sure what he has up his sleeves. (Read Techland’s Avatar review)

But even during that first viewing, I leaned in during the one and only Na’vi sex scene – curious about how mating would work on a moon in a faraway galaxy. Sadly there’s not that much detail in the film – with the camera pulling up into the air and the two blue fondlers lowering to a crouch, we can’t quite tell how this whole thing works.

Of course, nothing gets the intrawebs humming like questions about sex. And in the weeks since Avatar first opened, the kinky Na’vi speculation has soared to new heights. Well first let me say: I think Avatar is (and should be) the future of cinema. But I’m not so sure about the sex habits of the Pandoran natives.

The most compelling sex info to hit the web has been this, from the original Avatar script (published here), which points to the two Na’vi lovers forming the “bond” with one another. Quoting here, from the curiously precise (and trash novel-caliber) script, which is best read aloud:

NEYTIRI: Kissing is very good. But we have something better.

She pulls him down until they are kneeling, facing each other on the faintly glowing moss.

Neytiri takes the end of her queue and raises it. Jake does the same, with trembling anticipation. The tendrils at the ends move with a life of their own, straining to be joined.

MACRO SHOT — The tendrils INTERTWINE with gentle undulations.

JAKE rocks with the direct contact between his nervous system and hers. The ultimate intimacy.

They come together into a kiss and sink down on the bed of moss, and ripples of light spread out around them.

THE WILLOWS sway, without wind, and the night is alive with pulsing energy as we DISSOLVE TO —

LATER. She is collapsed across his chest. Spent. He strokes her face tenderly.

JAKE: Neytiri, you know my real body is far away, sleeping.

She raises up, placing her fingertips to his chest —

NEYTIRI: This body is real. (she touches his forehead) This spirit is real.

Her eyes are luminous, honest, infinitely deep.

In this context, there’s no mistaking just how important those long ponytails are to the Na’vi. They aren’t just their conduits to the planet’s biological systems; they are effectively the major sexual organs of those who call Pandora home. So perhaps not surprisingly, there is another scene in the original script where Tsu’Tey is scalped by a marine and proceeds to beg Jake to kill him. It’s the agony of the warrior who’s just lost his manhood, I guess. (More at Techland: The five most underrated sci-fi movie masterpieces)

Meanwhile, yesterday we first caught glimpse of this rather hilarious, thoroughly disturbing, decidedly offensive and NSFW Pandora sex parody. See it here at Newgrounds – and consider yourself warned.

Let’s just say I’ll never drink soup the same way again.

More at Techland: The top 10 sci-fi films of the decade

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