A lot of people love their cars. But would you friend yours?
Most of today’s cars are as much computer-on-wheels as they are transportation. Toyota and Salesforce.com have decided that if cars are going to be smart, they should be smart enough to talk to us.
Wait, though: not like KITT in Knight Rider. Not that sort of talk.
Something more like Facebook. They’re proposing a “private social network” that connects you with your vehicle.
“Owners will be able to ‘chat’ with their Toyotas like they would with a friend on Twitter or Facebook. The car would have its own ‘profile’ and send a message to the driver’s phone, for instance, reminding him to recharge its depleted battery. The owner would be able to carry out a simple, two-way conversation with the car.”
Wow. The mind boggles. What might a two-way conversation with a car be like? Hmmm…
@your_car @owner hi there!
@your_car @owner just wanted to let you know that i’m here
@your_car @owner you know, just in case you need me
@your_car @owner i’m right here, driving along
@your_car @owner sure is a lovely day for a drive huh?
@your_car @owner i could do with some gas, though
@owner @your_car please will you stop messaging me, i’m trying to drive here. I just had to pull over just to send this.
@your_car @owner sure thing boss!
@your_car @owner mind that old lady there.
@your_car @owner some gas would be nice
@your_car @owner oooh lookit that, I just passed 30k on the clock. time for a tune up.
@owner @your_car SHUT UP
@your_car @owner you got it! i’ll only trouble you with essential updates from now on! happy driving!
@your_car @owner gas. now.
@your_car @owner GAAAAAASSSSS
@owner @your_car why have you stopped? hello?
@your_car @owner YOU HAVE VOIDED YOUR WARRANTY PLEASE CONTACT YOUR AUTO DEALER IMMEDIATELY THIS DOES NOT AFFECT YOUR STATUTORY RIGHTS THIS MESSAGE WILL AUTO REPEAT EVERY FIVE MINUTES UNTIL DEACTIVATED BY AUTHORIZED PERSONNEL THANK YOU FOR BUYING THIS QUALITY VEHICLE