A Bunch of Tech Things People Have Threatened to Quit Recently

So you're quitting Instagram. Good for you! It's your right as a consumer. As a refresher, here's a look at some other tech-related products, companies and services people have threatened to quit recently.

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So you’re quitting Instagram. Good for you! It’s your right as a consumer. Vote with your wallet, as the saying goes – and if you’re not actually paying money for something, then vote with your data.

As a refresher, here’s a look at some other tech-related products, companies and services people have threatened to quit recently.

Facebook

Why? The new Timeline layout, the confusing privacy controls, the IPO that – gasp! – made some bankers rich at the expense of regular people, Facebook ads, Facebook hacks, employers looking at your Facebook profile, people looking at photos of you, people tagging you in photos, Facebook not letting people vote on privacy issues, promoted posts, Facebook is secretly in cahoots with the government to spy on you, Do Not Track, planking, your Facebook friends are boring now and all they do is talk about themselves, Facebook and Spotify showing everyone you listen to Taylor Swift.

Spotify

Why? Requiring you to use Facebook, showing all your Facebook friends that you listen to Taylor Swift.

Instagram

Why? Can now sell you to fur traders per the new Terms of Service.

Google

Why? Google knows everything about you, Google has too many ads, Google reads your email, Google is secretly in cahoots with the government to spy on you, Google has the audacity to turns its logo into cartoons, Google started out as “Backrub” which sounds really creepy, Google is in charge of Android, Google totally messed up Google Reader, Street View caught you passed out in a snowbank on New Year’s Day, Google+.

Apple

Why? Apple manufactures things in China, Apple doesn’t upgrade the iPhone’s hardware enough, Apple put out a new iPad right after the previous iPad, Apple users are sheep and you’re not a sheep, Steve Jobs never would have done what Tim Cook did those few times, the iPad Mini doesn’t have a Retina display, you still have to pay for iTunes music, too much patent litigation, Antennagate, Locationgate, Mapgate, Apple is secretly in cahoots with the government to spy on you.

Diablo 3, Mass Effect 3, All Games Ending in 3

Why? Required internet connections, crap endings to storylines except the game is basically you shooting at stuff, the third version is never as good as the second but the second’s better than the first, EA’s goal is to make money.

This Site

Why? We’re lazy, stupid, inconsequential, old, young, condescending, Apple pays us under the table, Google pays us under the table, Microsoft pays us under the table, Amazon pays us under the table, we never say anything bad about companies, we never say anything good about companies, all we write are lists.

Netflix

Why? The streaming content selection is crap, having both the DVD and streaming plans is so expensive you might as well start smoking again, Starz got dumped, Qwikster sounded like an app for drinking sugary milk.

Twitter

Why? Twitter censors people, Twitter doesn’t censor people you want censored, Twitter goes down sometimes, people overuse hashtags, most tweets are boring, sometimes people set up fake accounts to trick other people, Twitter has to make money, Twitter yanked Instagram support, Twitter is secretly in cahoots with the government to spy on you.

Yahoo

You’re just now quitting or threatening to quit Yahoo?

AT&T/Comcast/Dish/DirecTV/Sprint/T-Mobile/Time Warner/Verizon

Why? You dropped a very important call with your bestie once, the installer showed up late, nobody will give you a discount, your phone costs more than $200 if you lose it, your building was wired when Jesus was still alive so your internet access is slow sometimes, you get slammed for sending more than 1,000 text messages, all eight companies are secretly in cahoots with the government to spy on you.

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