“Reepicheep, a fearless mouse voiced by Eddie Izzard, is consistently appealing.” — The Wall Street Journal review of Prince Caspian
The White Witch… bit of a slag, isn’t she? Turning Mr. Tumnus to stone was one thing, but you know a girl’s a bitch if she bans Christmas. “No I’d rather not this year. Don’t fancy it. Even thought …
INT. TONY STARK’S LIMO – DAY
TONY STARK: Pull over… right here.
DRIVER: Where?
TONY STARK: At Burger King.
DRIVER: Are you serious?
TONY STARK: Didn’t you hear me say the first thing I wanted after being tortured in the desert by terrorists for three months was a real American cheeseburger?
DRIVER: Yeah, sure… but Burger …
It’s been twenty-three hours since 12:00 AM Pacific Standard Time, when Grand Theft Auto IV hit the streets of Los Angeles. My neck is stiff. My wife is mad. My dog is swollen with urine. But after almost a day of Liberty City action, one thing is clear:
Grand Theft Auto IV multiplayer blows Halo 3 multiplayer away.
Will the world …
A lot of movies these days are “From The Guys Who Brought You” some other movie. Of course, “From The Guys Who Brought You” is a perfectly bland way of saying — if you liked Superbad, you’ll like Forgetting Sarah Marshall. I did like Superbad, and I did like Forgetting Sarah Marshall. However, this dumb marketing phrase has inflicted …
EDITOR’S NOTE: Today’s Nerd World post, entitled “Wikipedia Brown And The Case Of The Unreliable Swear-filled Encyclopedia,” will not be seen today. Before the author had a chance to write it, he mentioned the idea to someone at work, who told him B.J. Novak from The Office already did a much better version of the idea than the author …
In the Simpsons rewrite room, the biggest compliment you can give to a joke is to call it “Swartzweldian.” Meaning, in the style of legendary Simpsons writer John Swartzwelder. Meaning (to me) uniquely dumb and smart at the same time. Meaning, great.
John Swartzwelder wrote fifty-nine episodes of The Simpsons, including such …
INT. LUCAS RANCH – SCREENING ROOM – DAY (1998)
As John Williams’ classic closing credits theme plays, the lights go up in George Lucas’ private screening room. Our heroes have done it. The fanboys have seen “The Phantom Menace.”
FANBOY #1: What the hell was that?
FANBOY #2: Midi-chlorians? Midi-chlorians!? What — the force is …
Puny Norton,
Please do not make Hulk’s new movie suck. Hulk want new movie to smash box office records, not smash nothing.
Hulk stuff always sucked. Starting with Hulk cartoon, when lady flapper sings “Aint he unglamorous!” in old-time voice. What the Hulk is that?
Then Hulk TV show. Too much puny Bixby, not enough Hulk. Yes, …
THE STAR WARS EMPEROR’S CLUB V.I.P. — VERY IMPERIAL PALPATINE
Princess Leia — Gold Slave Bikini — 7 Death Stars — 5000 Galactic Credits / hour
Princess Leia — Hoth Snowsuit — 3 Death Stars — 1000 Galactic Credits / hour
Aunt Beru — Tatooine Rags — 0 Death Stars — 5 Galactic Pennies / year
—
SUPERHERO LAIR …
The Summer Movie Season is now in spitting distance, and this year’s slew of lumbering mega-movies is plodding clumsily into view. But before everyone picks apart the (presumable) goofiness of big-budget behemoths like Speed Racer and The Incredible Hulk, let’s think back to four years ago, when a tiny-yet-sublime scrap of summer movie …
In the ever-raging battle for internet eyeballs, here’s a Yahoo News headline that probably grabbed more than a few:
REAL DEATH STAR COULD STRIKE EARTH
Wow, that is a big story. An actual man-made, planet-sized, battle-station could attack planet earth, just like in Star Wars. That certainly pushes the Hilary and Obama mudwrestling …
