News Flash: The iPhone Gets Slightly Better

The non-surprise is, obviously, 3G. Everbody wanted 3G, everybody knew they were putting in 3G, then they put in 3G. Yay!

I think the push-style syncing of mail, contacts and calendar, while not all that sexy, will make a huge difference to users. Though boo that you have to pay for it. And ditto the GPS, better audio, better price, …

A Cool Grant Morrison Moment

I’ve never really been one to follow comics writers and artists too closely. It’s a pure laziness thing. When all the smart, informed comics fans were like, Chris Claremont’s scripting on the Dark Phoenix saga is so being outstripped by Byrne’s powerful linework, I was all like, when I grow up I’m going to be Kitty Pryde’s boyfriend. …

I Am the Last Man on Earth…to See Indy 4

Saw it last night, and man, what a snooze. I almost would have preferred a Temple of Doom-style catastrophe — this wasn’t even bad, it was just dull. Since not a single other person on the Internet has blogged about Indy 4, I will now enrich world culture by posting my whining complaints (spoilers follow):

Nerd Archives — 1984

The following is an unedited transcription of one of Matt Selman’s actual eighth grade homework assignments.

Massively comic-book loving
Actively comic-book collecting
That is
The the [sic] avid
Hater of Wonder Woman
Ecch!
Wolverine is a

Super
Exciting
Lawless
Maniac
And
Not nice

Teacher’s comment: “Fun!”

Judd Apatow’s The Hobbit (Write-Your-Own Internet Comedy)

Editor’s Note: Matt Selman is busy this week with his commitments to the world of television and movies. In his absence, please execute the following high-concept internet comedy piece: How would the guys who brought you The 40 Year-Old-Virgin, Knocked Up and SuperBad cast and change the plot of J.R.R. Tolkien’s The Hobbit?

Penny Arcade and Homestar Runner: Now in Convenient, Sanitary Video Game Form

I remember when I interviewed the Homestar Runner guys back in 2003. I was sure they were on the brink of founding a whole Homestar Runner entertainment empire. Christmas specials, parade floats, novelty mudflaps, the works. They were the Charles Schulz’s of the Web. After the interview ran I would get calls from publishers begging for …

It…Moves

I don’t know if I have ever been more baffled by a consumer electronics product than I am by Sony’s Rolly, an MP3 player that sort of rolls around and flashes while it plays music. As of today it can be yours in exchange for 400 Earth dollars.

I cannot imagine how a non-high person could purchase, use, or have invented this object. I …

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