I Am Breaking Up With You Kotaku

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I’m serious this time, Kotaku. We’ve been here before, and I know, I know, I’ve always come crawling back. But this time I mean it. There’s no blame here. We’re just in different places right now.

Look at your front page. Look at it. Four stories about GTA IV sales in places where I don’t live (Australia, Europe, Japan and…Australia again). A story about an Assassin’s Creed patch. Your kid watched Empire Strikes Back. A porn starlet said something about video games in an interview somewhere. This isn’t a one-time thing, Kotaku. This is part of a pattern.

And I’m not even going to bring up your obsession with video game-related crafts. We both know what I’m talking about. And cakes. And tattoos. I know there people out there who love those things. You’ll find one. Someday. But I like games. Not things that are related to games.

Seriously, I’ve been reading Kotaku for ages, because (as with most of the Gawker sites) their writers are really really good. And they know their stuff. But my God, I need a new source for gaming news. I don’t have time to crawl a million industry sites, I need a thoughtful, well-written, kick-ass aggregator. One that will spare me having to trudge through a dillion flash-lit pictures of Zelda-themed macrame displayed on somebody’s depressing-looking kitchen table. Can anybody fix me up? Where do you go?

Update: The Internet is mad at me for not reading Kotaku! To be clear: I get less traffic than Kotaku. The Kotaku writers are better writers, better gamers, better parents, and better people than I will ever be. I never meant to imply otherwise.

But I still don’t care about GTA IV bundles in Australia. And a million voices crying out in the wilderness cannot make me care.