Featuring two movies I’m definitely going to see five years from now when they’re being rerun on basic cable for the 90th time.
— Ghost Rider, starring Nicolas “I Probably Could Have Been Iron Man” Cage as a dude who turns into a dude with a burning skull for a head, who rides a motorcycle, which is also burning. It’s currently rocking a 29% score on Rotten Tomatoes. Hey, wait a minute — this is from that guy who made Daredevil. When did they let him out of movie jail?
— Bridge to Terabithia, which as discussed has nothing to do with the Narnian island of Terabinthia, though I always find myself listening for that missing ‘n.’ Instead it’s about two kids who stumble into a hidden fantasyland. See the difference there? Actually, it’s mostly about the relationship between two alienated kids, and critics seem to be pretty impressed. But it’s probably two young-adult and heartwarming for my cold, blackened, bitter heart.
Maybe I’ll stay home and watch lightbulbs burn out instead (scroll down for a non-color-adjusted version of this rather striking image).